Slipstream – Again

In my last post I wrote out the words “I can’t believe I’m not even on cold medicine yet.” The key word there being yet. When it kicked in, I had to stop this movie, because… well. Many reasons. You don’t really need to be high in any way to feel like Anthony Hopkins is fucking with your head, and it also became slightly confusing to my eyes, so many flashing scenes, it was hard for my eyes to focus.

There are three main pieces of advice I feel the need to give out here before I continue.

1. If you don’t like surrealism, you have no business watching this movie. If you do watch it, being not a fan of the surrealist movement, and discover yourself angered or otherwise unhappy with your viewing time, it’s your own goddamned fault. If you do not like/adamantly hate a particular genre, don’t watch said genre, because you’re not going to enjoy yourself. It’s pretty simple.

2. Do not take cold medicine to watch this movie.

3. Watch it all at once. The experience will be much more fulfilling for you.

I, myself, am a very large fan of surrealism. Of course, I had no idea that’s what I was getting into when I clicked on the play button in Netflix. I mainly did it because I saw the words “Written and directed by Anthony Hopkins”. I’m a very very big fan of his, so I couldn’t really pass it up.

The problem I’m finding with Netflix is that the descriptions don’t really fit or tell you what’s truly going to happen in the movie you’re about to watch. I discovered this huge flaw for the first time (the first time rather glaringly, I should say) when I watched Decent. You know, that one with Rosario Dawson and rape? That was not fully explained in the description. It didn’t even hint at what the ending was going to be like, and I sort of feel like it should have.
In this case, nobody saw fit to mention that there would be heavy surrealism going on. Not that I feel the need to be forewarned about that every time, but it’d be nice to know I should wait to take my cold medication until I’m done with the movie.

I find myself making comparisons to the movie Stay now that I’ve watched all of Slipstream. There are some very clear similarities, though things are done in a different way. Two different stories using similar keys in them.
I really liked Stay, a lot. A lot a lot. I don’t have a good enough vocabulary to fully expound on how much I adore Stay. Naturally I’m having similar feelings to this movie.

I love things that make me think. Really love them. I love things that are fucked up. I love surrealism. I love Anthony Hopkins. There really wasn’t a single part of this movie I didn’t love. Everything was done so beautifully.

Anthony Hopkins has a wonderfully visual mind. You get the impression that he’s extremely intelligent just from any brief TMZ encounter with him, you know that he’s a good actor. But you don’t really get a good look inside of his head. With this movie, I feel like he opens himself up and shows you a glimpse of what he’s capable of. Really capable of. Just a tiny little look that leaves the impression that if he were given the reins of the world, nothing would ever be the same.

One further thing I feel I have to make note of, not that it really has to do with the movie itself or Anthony Hopkins, is the fact that for the past few days, every movie I have decided to watch has had Michael Clark Duncan in it. I’m unsure if this is a Universe Note or what, but it’s been pretty strange.

This movie is definitely not for everyone. I’m not going to tell everyone to rush out and find it as soon as possible as I do with other films. But I am going to say that I enjoyed it 100%, and I would like Anthony Hopkins to do more of this kind of thing.

Please.

Pretty please.

Pretty please with fava beans on top.

Doubt

I’ve been wanting to see this movie since it was first advertised on television. I just never got around to doing that. I’m sort of glad for it now, as I think I might have been a little sore at having to spend any sort of money on this movie.

It’s not that it’s bad, per se. It’s more that it feels…. unfinished. Like they had to stop filming right at a crucial point and had to just do the ending real quick.

I get the premise of the movie, and I think I see what they were trying to do with it ultimately. I feel like they wanted you to come out of the movie wondering who was right in the whole thing. Who was guilty or not. What the truth was. I feel like it was supposed to be one of those thinker flicks that get put out every now and again, and it was supposed to be really hard hitting and glorious.

The thing is, I see the potential for that. I do. I felt like it was really gearing up to be this psychological masterpiece. That at the end of it I would have to sit and think a bit to really figure out what I thought and felt.

It just didn’t happen.

And it’s just out of grasp, too. Just right there, right out there where your fingertips can almost touch, but not quite. On quick, strong willed bursts, you can feel the soft brush of the point along the tip of your nail, but are unable to snag it.

I think that if this was originally a book, it must have gotten that point across much better. Sometimes books are just far more capable of getting these things through. If it’s not a book, maybe instead of making it into a movie, it should have been made into a novel.

Disappointment is a strong word, I think. I’d rather go with left wanting.

The People Under The Stairs

I haven’t seen this movie in a really long time, and there’s a reason for it. I wasn’t particularly impressed with it the first go ’round. Maybe it got hyped up to me too much, or maybe I’ve been snobbish about my horror movies since I was little.

Recently, however, I started to remember these times when a cousin of mine used to want to play “People Under The Stairs”. You know, we pretend to be characters in the movie. Reenact it. Whatever. I was remembering that she always played the girl, you know, the one played by A.J. Langer – you might better know her as Rayanne Graff from My So Called Life (don’t even lie, you watched it, too). And she would always make me be Fool. The little black boy who eventually saves the day.

Anyhow. (She said, not wanting to get into the creepy things her cousin made her say and do) I thought that since I was thinking about it lots recently, I might as well watch it again.

Let me just say this = I fell asleep through the middle part and I still feel like I wasted my time. I do not like this movie any more than I did when I was younger. I don’t. And I’m starting to wonder if I have some sort of grudge against Wes Craven or something, because almost every one of his older movies that I’ve encountered or rewatched recently has been an incredible disappointment.

On the other hand, I could have just been recalling awkward memories too much and rested the burden of those on Mr Craven’s shoulders instead of where they belong, which is sitting firmly on my cousin’s.

The best part, I think, was watching Ving Rhames pre-Marsellus Wallace. No less of a badass, mind. Just more of a babyface. Just squish his little cheekses and make kissy face. Or not.

I’m curious to watch The Serpent And The Rainbow now to see if it, at least, stands up to my hopes and memories. Memories of how it was the first time, and hopes that I haven’t become such a prick about my horror that I can’t enjoy it like I used to.

Fear Dot Com

It’s pretty sad when even on muscle relaxers and pain killers a movie isn’t even remotely good. Which was the case for this one.

This really has to be one of the worst movies ever made. Not only that, but it steals a good majority of it’s imagery from The Ring. I don’t know where the rest of it came from, but I find it hard to believe that any of it was an original idea.

The acting in this movie was so bad that even if the script had been good, the whole thing would have still sucked. Lucky for the actors, the scrip was absolute shit. It gives them a small sort of excuse, I suppose, for future projects.

I believe the whole premise of this movie was that this guy is a serial killer and one of his victims wants revenge on him. But I’m not quite sure why she’d be attacking other innocent people. If she’s that upset about her torture and murder, you’d think that she’d feel protective of others, not violent toward them.

This movie was such a colossal failure that I had to watch the ending twice just to try to figure out what it all had to do with anything. I’m betting that Stephen Dorff was really glad his character got killed off, so if anybody gets the ‘brilliant’ idea of making a sequel, he won’t have to have anything to do with it.

Hounddog

This was supposed to be some massively controversial flick because Dakota Fanning plays the victim of a rape during it. While that’s really a horrible thing to go through, you don’t see anything, really. You see her and blackness. You hear sounds. She’s screaming. The rape is thusly implied.

But it’s really not enough to get your panties in a bunch for.

Not exactly sure why I watched this movie. Maybe I was hoping it would bore me to sleep. Unfortunately, it didn’t. And just when the thing had potential to get interesting, it ended.

I was never a huge Dakota Fanning fan, and this film didn’t do anything to raise my opinion of her in any way. Her acting was bad. Whoever directed her did a bad job. The story was really boring. Boring story just amplified bad acting.

Then on top of it all, they butcher the shit out of Elvis over and over and over and over and over, until you can hardly remember what his song sounds like coming out of his mouth.

This certainly was a waste of time.

Weeds – 2

Yes, I just finished out the second season of Weeds. No, I am no more impressed than I was previously.

There were, I have to grant it, more of the funny lines, more of the funny situations. More fucked up, as it went. But it wasn’t anything that I didn’t expect, considering. The situations, I mean.

Except for the crazy girlfriend who shows up out of nowhere who just felt like she was thrown in to give the uncle more screen time. Don’t get me wrong, I adore Zooey. I think she’s wonderful, and great at what she does. I still don’t think that her part in this show was really …. necessary.

I also got to discover that I hate that stupid fucking intro song no matter who sings it. Or, in once case, if nobody sings it. I hate it. I hate it and it’s now stuck in my head because it’s not a hard song, and the lyrics are slightly repetitive, so there it is, in my brain, eating away at the things I need, so that I find myself sitting in the bathtub fucking singing it.

Or some variation of it with my own words trying to make it vacate it’s tenancy.

As far as I am concerned, everybody is dead at the end of season two. It works for me. I stand by my previous comment that it’s not the worst show in the world. It’s really not horrible, I guess I’m just really annoyed that everybody else enjoys it so much and I find it dull. I want to be in the circle. I want to be part of the in crowd, a cool kid. I want to say – Hey, yeah, I watch Weeds, cool, so do you. But I can’t. Because I don’t like it enough.

And if that song doesn’t get out of my head in the next day, my brain is going to have to find itself a new home.