The Hebrew Hammer

Just in time for Christmas (Wow, talk about a backlog), I thought this would be a good one to watch. Okay, so it really had nothing to do with the holiday season at all, and everything to do with the description of the movie itself. The fact that everything was so wrong, just felt so very right. So many elements of wrongness. All come together in a celebration of joy and hilarity.

The three words that completely sum up my view of this movie? See it now. Even as I was watching it, I was texting people and telling them that they, too, should be watching it. Because it was glorious from the get go.

Adam Goldberg has been a favorite of mine for a long time. One of those sorts of actors that you don’t really think about much until you see them on screen, and there’s a silent “OH! YEAY!” that swells in your mind. He unfortunately doesn’t get much in the way of lead roles, which is a damn shame, but he always shines in whatever he does. Imagine my joy in seeing him here.

The casting is great, filled with random people showing up in really random parts and just adding to the glory of this movie. The story is absurd – and great. You’ve got this Jewish Superhero Detective (Certified Circumcised Dick), who has to save Hanukkah from Santa’s evil son (who has killed Santa in a brutal reindeer slaying). The whole thing is fucking hilarious.

One of my passionate joys in life is names. I get a kick out of names in movies, if they’re references to something else, if they’re just wonderfully absurd. And this movie is filled with many fantastic names. Not just people names either. Places, things. All of it makes me giddy. I don’t know why.

Mordechai Jefferson Carver
The Jewish Justice League
Esther Bloomenbergansteinenthal
Mohammed Ali Paula Abdul Rahiem

Glorious. Just glorious.

“My mother is my pimp!”



It occurred to me the other day that despite the fact that I feel like I’ve read a thousand pounds worth of Stephen King novels, I’ve really not read that many of them. The older ones are really the ones that I’m missing, which meant that I was sort of feeling out of the loop a little bit.

Not long ago I re-read Christine, and it sort of put me in the mood for more King. So I recently picked up It and Firestarter at the used book store.

I’m not quite sure why I keep insisting on getting his books in hard back. I think every single King book that I have is hard back. No, wait. Night Shift is not. Okay, so the majority of them are hard back. This is killing me. They’re so effing heavy. They’d be heavy as paper backs. But nooo. My stupid ass keeps getting them with fourteen extra pounds on them.

Makes it really hard to read a book in the bath tub when you need something solid to prop it up on so you don’t break your wrists.

Should hint at you that I’m reading It first.

I’ve seen not It in movie form. How could I not? I’ve had a giant crush on Tim Curry for a really really long time. IT just never happened (ha!) I just know he’s hella creepy in the movie. So maybe I should see if I can get it streamed on Netflix.

The book jumps pretty quickly into the good stuff, though. I’m only about 150 pages in, which would be significant in a normal book, but isn’t even a tenth of this book.